Something Large and Angry This Way Comes

14 Mar

Free agent guard/center Richie Incognito is visiting the Dolphins this week. All Dolphins players and staff members should be prepared to slug it out with Richie at any moment. He will straight up throw down at the drop of a hat, with no provocation or mercy. He was released from the Rams this year after two personal foul calls (for headbutting) cost the team a chance at getting blown out by slightly less than 40 points against the Titans. Oh, and he also got into a shouting match with Coach Steve Spagnuolo on the sidelines. Richie loses it on gameday with alarming regularity. He has committed multiple personal foul penalties in four different games. He’s almost mixed it up with some fans as well. He has paid a small fortune in fines since his arrival in the league, and was named the dirtiest player in the league in a Sporting News poll of NFL players.

Also, he’s a heck of a guard, a physical freak who has helped the Rams run the ball well, even when they were impotent in every other phase of the game. He’s just 26 years old, and would probably be available at a very reasonable price. Not to mention a closer look at the timing of his transgressions indicates that he became more and more angry as the Rams plunged deeper and deeper into the NFL toilet.

So perhaps on a better team, sharing the O-line with Long, Smiley, Grove and Carey, we would get the best of Richie, and not the Frankenstein, “fire bad” Richie? I think we’d have a pretty wicked offensive front, so long as the rest of the guys could slap Richie around if and when he goes AWOL.

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6 Responses to “Something Large and Angry This Way Comes”

  1. thefalloutgirl March 14, 2010 at 6:54 pm #

    I guess the most baffling thing is I have no idea when or why you decided to root for Miami. Did you live there? Go to school there? Visit there?

  2. danewen March 14, 2010 at 7:37 pm #

    Good question. I was born in Miami’s Hialeah Hospital, delivered by Dr. Fernandez on a lovely November morning. I attended pre-school at the First Church of North Miami Congregational on 135th Street in North Miami, where I would go on to attend the lovely William Jennings Bryan Elementary School. From a young age I was taught an undying love for all things Dolphins. Additionally I was baptized in the firelight of Dan Marino on November 10th, 1985, when I stood in the Orange Bowl, sobbing with joy after Dan hit Mark Duper for a 50-yard, game winning touchdown with just seconds left to play.

    Although for middle and high school we were forced to relocate to Athens, Georgia, my love for the SoFlo Sea Mammals would never fade.

  3. InFINcible March 16, 2010 at 7:55 am #

    Though not a dirty player IMO first name that comes to mind: Bryan Cox. We need some tough nasty dudes on our team, would be sweet on the offensive side of the ball. With JP gone who’s gonna fire up our D???

    • danewen March 16, 2010 at 11:29 am #

      I want a little more nastiness on our O-line. I think Richie would win the RG spot, and would help keep our rushing offense near the best in the league. On D, I think Nolan’s arrival will do wonders for our identity. Also, I look for Cameron Wake to step into that JP role. I think that kid has fire. I also see 18 sacks for him if he wins the full time gig.

  4. thefalloutgirl March 27, 2010 at 2:25 am #

    Yeah. And I’m a helicopter flying to the top of Everest.

    • danewen March 28, 2010 at 11:31 am #

      Watch yourself, Fallout Girl. You might find yourself in a cooling tower.

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