Jet Releases Santonio Holmes!

30 Apr

Eager to revel in any misfortune that befalls the New York Jets, The Bottlenose is pleased as punch to hear that new acquisition Santonio Holmes was kicked off of a plane in Pittsburgh last night for being unruly.

It’s sad, but from this offseason on Santonio and Brandon Marshall’s off the field careers may be compared as much as their game day exploits. Both were added to help young quarterbacks make the leap into elite status, but both have checkered pasts.

The AFC East arms race continues. It is said that both the Jets and Dolphins are circling Patriot cast away Adalius Thomas. But as far as these talented new wideouts thrown into the mix, it will be about both stat sheets and rap sheets.

The first hiccup belongs to Mr. Holmes.

UPDATE: More details are emerging. Apparently Santonio refused to turn off both his iPod and nose hair trimmer as his flight took off from New York. Once they landed in Pittsburgh he was met by police. No charges were filed against him, but if the kid doesn’t know better now, he probably won’t know better in the future.

UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: It was during landing in Pittsburgh that Santonio refused to turn off his iPod. His nose hair trimmer had already run out of battery somewhere over Camden, New Jersey.  The flight crew notified the police about his non-compliance. After landing the boys in blue explained to Santonio that he should have just turned off the iPod. Santonio agreed with them, since they had the power to arrest him. Everyone went home to their loved ones. End of story.

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9 Responses to “Jet Releases Santonio Holmes!”

  1. Jim May 1, 2010 at 11:49 am #

    What the jets didnt cut holmes wht is this about ?

    • danewen May 1, 2010 at 12:30 pm #

      Who said they did? The jet released him, not the Jets.

    • WOW May 21, 2010 at 2:41 pm #

      wow are you stupid who said the jets released him

  2. Jim May 19, 2010 at 3:01 pm #

    Oh well excuse me retard maybe you should have put Jet kicks Holmes off cuz Released really makes it seem like the jets cut him SO GET A LIFE

    • danewen May 19, 2010 at 6:27 pm #

      I am not a “retard”. I am just a normal guy with a second grade education and restless leg syndrome, trying to make sense out of this crazy world.

      And who uses the word “retard” anymore? Where’d you pick that up? 1952?

      • Jim May 20, 2010 at 6:05 pm #

        What do you mean who says retard lots of people do where have you been the last 15..wait let me quess at the dollor store buy star wars toys

    • peter May 20, 2010 at 6:08 pm #

      dang jim you have problems your just getting mad because your embarresd that you cant read right plus you really shouldnt be acting like a jerk

  3. peter May 20, 2010 at 6:10 pm #

    hey danewen good article keep on writing and dont pay attention to those losers like jim

  4. Jim May 21, 2010 at 2:46 pm #

    hey danewen sorry about those comments i think someone copied my name plus i just foun this article so i think someone had the same name………keep on writing great job

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