Preseason Week 2 Stock Report – QB Sizzles, QB Fizzles

22 Aug

THE DOW (Dolphins’ Overall Worth): 769 points (+28).


Chad Henne (NASDAQ: HENE) + 5 1/4: Only one pass off the mark all night. Threaded the needle beautifully on his shorter touchdown to Fasano. He’s the closest thing we’ve seen to you know who since you know who. Expect HENE to rise exponentially throughout the fall.

Anthony Fasano (NYSE: FSNO) +3 3/4: Tony Sparano spoke not long ago about how The Beast would unlock things for Fasano. We certainly saw that tonight, not just in the attention Marshall demanded from the Jaguar defense, but also in the fantastic blocking he served up on Anthony’s long score. Very promising for the tight end, who’s only a season removed from 7TDs.

Brandon Marshall (NYSE: BMAR) +3: So okay, his hands aren’t quite “regular season ready”, but he certainly looked good gathering that Chad Pennington lob. A great catch, followed by a tough run. His blocking ability is a forgotten asset. Not many WRs have this in their portfolio, and it’s a big reason for this boost tonight.


Nolan Carroll (NYSE: NCRL) -3/4: A little bit of a week 2 slump for the super sleeper from Maryland. The toast of training camp was picked on a bit tonight, and reminded us all that he is just a rookie, and still a work in progress. Still, continued his steady work on kickoffs, and figures to replace Patrick “Probably a Little Faster than Betty White” Cobbs on returns.

Dolphin Special Teams (NYSE: DST) -3: Another week, another blocked punt. Not to mention Jacksonville’s Deji Karim had about 917 return yards tonight. Carroll was solid. Otherwise shares would have dipped further.

Pat White (NASDAQ: DONE) -8 1/2: Not so much as a snap tonight. Reports from his practices have been awful. He’s not going to make this team as a QB, yet hasn’t been tried anywhere else either. Destined for penny stock status, Pat is in dire need of a bailout. Done indeed.


Overall, plenty to be happy with on Saturday night. Some good performances, and no one struck by lightning. You have to score points to win in today’s market, and the Dolphins flashed some serious earning potential against the Jags.

Go Dolphins!

Fyi, The Bottlenose is now on Twitter. Follow us, @thebottlenose


5 Responses to “Preseason Week 2 Stock Report – QB Sizzles, QB Fizzles”

  1. Strange August 22, 2010 at 5:38 am #

    The SCB (Startig Corner Backs) continues to plummet.

    • danewen August 22, 2010 at 7:04 am #

      SCB is certainly not inspiring consumer confidence right now. But hopefully these are just growing pains that will be worked out by next quarter. Thanks for stopping by The Bottlenose!

      • chuck August 22, 2010 at 8:50 am #

        Remember the value of SCB is linked directly to the innovation that will be developed by the new CEO of Miami’s Defense (NYSE: DEF) Nolan. I believe that after the shareholders meeting on 9/11/2010, he will have presented a new scheme that will perplex offenses and give ample opportunities for our young corners to make plays, and they will take advantage of those opportunities.

  2. chuck August 22, 2010 at 8:43 am #

    Like what you are doing with the stock market comparison. Might be a good idea to used a four letter symbol for the NASDAQ stocks (ex. HENE). Also, the value of the the total team cannot be 89 if Pat White can lose 8 at this point and still be alive. If his value was say 66 to start the season and it has trickled to maybe 6 now, then the whole team would have a value of nearly 800-1000 altogether. I think it would be a great idea to say the team value would represent their league standing, with the best team in the league trading at or around 1000. The worst of the playoff-caliber teams would have a value around 800. I would say our team value would be in the 750-800 range right now based on that.

    • danewen August 22, 2010 at 8:56 am #

      Old Dominion in the house! Thanks, Chuck. I know a little bit about football, but next to nothing about stocks. I will adjust my post accordingly. All hail Chuck, new Financial Advisor for The Bottlenose.

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