Jumpin’ Jehosaphat! Gigantic Jenkins Junked for Jerk Jets!

14 Sep

The mountain in the middle of the reigning #1 defense in the NFL turned into a lump of green Jell-o Monday evening, during an affair that showcased a thuggish, undisciplined, sloppy Jets team molded in its Head Coach’s image.

Gang Green rang up 14 penalties for 125 yards, and nearly set a franchise records for fewest first downs in a game. Mark Sanchez looked lost, as his team threw more punches than passes. Shonn Greene was outplayed by an AARP member. Braylon Edwards barely had a chance to drop a pass.

Still, they were playing an AFC Super Bowl favorite in the Ravens, who have a hell of a defense. To the Jets’ credit, they did a good job slowing Baltimore as well. But New York suffered a literally huge loss when behemoth defensive anchor Kris Jenkins was felled for the season by a torn ACL.

We wish injuries on no one, even players who stoop so low as to suit up for the Jets. But we can’t help but think this will certainly soften the Jets up front, perhaps for a little Ronnie, Ricky and Lousaka action? Miami’s time of possession could see a little boost. Those “two yards and a cloud of dust” plays might become four yards now.

Moving the chains against these guys may have just gotten a tad bit easier, even if they do have the magical “12th man” boost of that bald fireman guy riding on that other guy’s shoulders. Just. Plain. Weird.

I mean, firemen are heroes and all, but when are we going to say, "Fireman Ed, for the love of God, get off that guy's shoulders and cheer like the rest of us!"


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