Dolphins Can’t Win One for the Flipper

2 Jan

A lifeless Miami squad flopped around on the Foxboro turf for a few hours today. Winning one for Tony wasn’t enough. Winning for pride wasn’t enough. This team decided, shortly after kickoff, that enough was enough.  

The Bottlenose would like to thank the Patriots for not phoning this in, and creating the illusion that all is well in Davie by handing us a hollow victory. We got spanked by a better team. A team that goes for the jugular. A team that plays to win, from start to finish.

Tony Sparano is by all accounts a good guy. But on the sidelines, we can’t remember many times he has gone for the knockout blow. We can’t remember many times he strayed from the Conservative Coaching for Dummies handbook. Hell, even the most by the book coaches will throw a Hail Mary at the buzzer to go for the win. We kneel it at midfield

Sparano, an O-line coach, spent much of the offseason obliterating the interior line of the #4 rushing offense in football. Our running game is gone, and it has killed us all season.

Sparano hitched his wagon to Chad Henne. He was our secret weapon after passing on Matty “Ice” Ryan. This strategy is looking more and more like a failure.

Don’t be afraid of regime change. The Trifecta itself went 11-5 as a new regime in Miami. Cowher? 11-5 his maiden voyage in Pittsburgh. Gruden’s first year in Tampa? Super Bowl Champions.

Fresh eyes can make a world of difference, and what we saw today is more than something a few tweaks can remedy.   

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4 Responses to “Dolphins Can’t Win One for the Flipper”

  1. InFINcible January 3, 2011 at 12:11 pm #

    I’ve been on the fence about how I feel about keeping or canning Sparano. Then a saw a picture of him celebrating like he wont the Superbowl, however the caption said “Dolphin’s coach Tony Sparano celebrates extra point”. Extra freakin’ point?!?!?!? I guess when you play not to lose every point matters.

    With all the player’s comments recently I think they really believe he is a good coach, I have no idea. Maybe Sparano and Henning knew what they had with Henne and that’s why we didn’t take chances and why we played not to lose. Maybe that’s just their nature. What I do know is you can bring in Gruden, Cowher, Harbaugh, but unless they come with a Franchise QB we are still gonna suck. Hopefully we at least keep Nolan.

    • danewen January 3, 2011 at 12:28 pm #

      Well, to be fair, Cowher went 11-5 with Neil O’Donnell his first season with the Steelers. And Gruden won it all with Brad Johnson, nine months after he was hired.

      • InFINcible January 3, 2011 at 1:48 pm #

        So are you saying Henne is as good as either of those two? Or is there a veteran out there that we can pick up as a stop gap? Whatever happened to Bulger? I’d take anybody at this point.

        I wish we’d given Thigpen more of a look to find out if he has the goods. He seems to be the gunslinger we need with a WR like B. Marshall that you just gotta throw it up to sometimes.

      • danewen January 3, 2011 at 2:45 pm #

        Just saying that when you’ve got a top 5 defense (like we do, and Pitt and TB did), it might not take a “franchise QB”.

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