The “Clusterfin” in Miami Could Make for a Great Offeason

20 Jan

Can “The Bifecta” really draft a rookie quarterback? Does Tony “Sir Kicks-a-Lot” Sparano really have the luxury of developing another first year signal caller? Is Kathy “Jeff” Ireland really going to send some poor schlub to the podium to hand in a first round pick that isn’t going to immediately pay dividends? Don’t let the extension fool you, I can already hear the faint sound of The King singing It’s Now or Never.

Which has led us to one of the few possible silver linings of this “clusterfin” of a month: THERE MAY BE NO SUCH THING AS PATIENCE.

How many Dan Marinos are there in the world? How many baby-faced quarterbacks are ready to step in and make a big time difference? It’s extremely rare, and if you listen to the experts, all of the incoming rookie QBs have some major pimples. So, if you’re reporting to work in Davie and you hear a sizzling sound whenever you take a seat, are you really going to think in terms of two, three years from now?

Not when Vince Young is going to be up for grabs. Not when Kyle Orton was yanked by the Broncos after his 20TD/9INT, 280ypg performance in Denver. There could be a plug-and-play, quality solution at quarterback for the SoFlo Sea Mammals, and the current regime would be very wise to pursue that option.

That could potentially set the Dolphins to go one of two directions in the first round. Again, with the ice cracking beneath their feet, Jeff and Tony probably can’t think about projects. They can’t think about players that will be good once they improve this or that down the line. They don’t have the luxury of considering rotation guys. With a top six defense, they ain’t going that direction either.

No, at pick 15 we’re probably talking about either a shi*-stomping, monster offensive lineman, or a stud running back. Think Maurkice Pouncey in Pittsburgh. Think the South Florida reboot of Maurice Jones-Drew. The demise of our #4 rushing attack was a huge failing in 2010. Pouncey’s little brother maybe? ‘Bama’s Mark Ingram perhaps? The common denominator? Both would play immediately, and we think they’d hit the ground running.

If the monster lineman was there in round 1, perhaps Ross would then write a check out to DeAngelo Williams? Ahmad Bradshaw maybe (if the G-Men dared to let him walk)? And if we did grab our running back of the future at pick 15, surely we’d dive into the free agent o-line talent pool with reckless abandon.

Ross is desperate to field a winner. Sparano and Ireland are desperate to win immediately. There’s no more gradual improvement, with the Tuna patting Tony on the rear end and waddling around the practice field in his nipple-high shorts. The 5th round OG prospect isn’t going to cut it this time. Hoping to strike gold with the next Terrell Davis is a sucker’s bet. More than ever, this will be a Dolphin offseason based on “the now”. Jeff Ireland may have to toss his “stick to the draft board no matter what” philosophy into the trash.

The Dolphins have very specific holes. Fill those holes now, with legit starters, and this regime may somehow survive. Armed with a big enough checkbook, and teetering on the edge of the unemployment line, this could be the Bifecta’s finest hour.  Stranger things have happened anyway. Like this.

GO DOLPHINS, and feel free to follow us on Twitter @thebottlenose

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3 Responses to “The “Clusterfin” in Miami Could Make for a Great Offeason”

  1. brandon January 20, 2011 at 11:56 am #

    vince young migh be a decent pickup but not orton. is it just more or are they over looking Jeff garcia. Hes a solid QB with expierence. we need mostly offense. trade henne keep pennington around. build offensive line(center first). RB,big WR,TE,LG, then LB,DE,CB. Mainly offense. Henne needs to go! trade him. keep pennington

  2. inFINS January 20, 2011 at 12:20 pm #

    I think that if they want to take a QB, and if throughout the season this rookie QB appears to have been an excellent choice, and the team shows promise, then its possible that Sparano and Ireland would be allowed another season.

    • Dan Ewen January 20, 2011 at 12:30 pm #

      Possible, but “showing promise” is a broad definition. Almost every team in the NFL showed promise in one way or another.

      How many wins are we talking? Does a 7-9 record keep The Bifecta in business?

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