The Fibbing Fin: Dolphins Sweeten Stadium Deal with Promise of Arcade Game

2 Feb

Golden Tee. The game changer.

Dolphins CEO Mike Dee sweetened the proposed stadium deal Tuesday afternoon, with the promise of a Golden Tee arcade game between the entrances of Lower Sideline South Sections 145 and 146. The move sent a shock wave through the South Florida political sphere, which has been at odds about the plan since its infancy.

The Sun Life Stadium renovation proposal, which calls for the construction of a giant, $250,000,000 umbrella above the fans, was already on shaky ground. The powerful Umbrella and Poncho Producers Union had poured millions of dollars into stopping it. That was before the Dolphins proposed collecting taxes from neighboring Broward County. The violent reaction of Broward officials left the entire matter on life support.

That was, until Dee remembered how much fun he had playing Golden Tee last June while waiting for a plane at the Reno airport. “It was a real hoot,” explains Dee. “There was that rollerball and stuff. And you could choose from lots of golf courses. I had a feeling this might kickstart the whole proposal.”

It certainly did. Opponents of the renovation plan were left scrambling throughout the day, helpless to counter the potential joy and endless stream of quarters the game might produce for the region.

Some foes still decried the idea of “piggybacking” the Sun Life renovations to much-needed upgrades at the Convention Center. But Dee worked his magic again, offering a sit-down, two player Ms. Pac Man machine for the Convention Center lobby. Several key players changed their stances after this latest tweak. Still, Miami City Commissioner Marc David Sarnoff remained unimpressed as of Tuesday night, calling the changes “completely unrealistic”.

“Where do Stephen Ross and Mike Dee plan to find these arcade games?” asks Sarnoff. “Sounds like more pie in the sky promises to me.”

–BS Newswire


4 Responses to “The Fibbing Fin: Dolphins Sweeten Stadium Deal with Promise of Arcade Game”

  1. eric February 2, 2011 at 7:07 am #

    Is this from the Onion? It wouldnt suprise me if it was true.

    • Dan Ewen February 2, 2011 at 8:29 am #

      Certainly in the spirit of The Onion, but cooked up here at The Bottlenose. Thanks for dropping by.


  2. dolphinz4life February 2, 2011 at 11:17 am #

    The Los angeles Dolphins…. Im liking the idea!

    • Dan Ewen February 2, 2011 at 1:46 pm #

      At least they’d be moving to a place with actual dolphins. Unlike the Utah Jazz. Jazz? In Utah? WTF?

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