Top Ten Things We Want to See Tonight

12 Aug

10. A sack for Jason Taylor, followed by a wicked Fox Trot celebration dance.

9. No passes under 12 yards for Chad Henne. None. He throws one checkdown and we waive him!

8. Reggie Bush takes a draw play 58 yards for the score, then reveals Kim Kardashian portrait tattoo during third quarter interview. 

7. No dropped interceptions. 19 of ’em last year.  If our D wants to take the next step, we can’t botch those.

6. Phillip Livas takes a kick return the distance, literally leaving a vapor trail. Yes, he’s our man crush, but he won’t make this team if he doesn’t prove that he’s Dante Hall in a wig.

5. A disciplined Paul Soliai, angling for an extension, blows through the line, snaps Michael Turner in half, but resists the temptation to eat him.

4. Cameron Wake receives a new contract at halftime, after racking up five sacks on twelve plays.  

3. Chemistry between Henne and Marshall, namely trust on Chad’s part. He throws it up and lets #19 go get it. He’s called The Beast for a reason.

2. No injuries. No sprains, no breaks, no tears. Not even a hangnail.

1. Our first opportunity to play the NFL’s new drinking game, Touchback Tequila (Touchback Tecate for you beer drinkers out there). Take a swig every time a kickoff sails through the uprights.

Football is here! GO DOLPHINS, and feel free to follow us on Twitter @thebottlenose


3 Responses to “Top Ten Things We Want to See Tonight”

  1. Fintasy August 12, 2011 at 10:40 am #

    This list meets my approval

  2. antonio August 12, 2011 at 12:32 pm #

    Really??? Be realistic bro these are 10 things you absolutely wont see tonight. Looks like a 11 year old made this list! Sparano specificly said they are playing soft tonight.
    10. Jason taylor getting a sac, more than likely. i could see that tonight.
    9. No pass under 12 yards, are u freakin nuts! who the hell has ever played a nfl game without a pass under 12 yards!? Hes Chad Henne not Dan Marino!!
    8. Reggie goin 58 yards, that would be freaking SWEET!! But dont expect it cuz ONCE AGAIN, they will NOT be playing to win!
    7. A kick return?? did u watch any game last night??? Kicking off from the 35 leaves NO CHANCE for kick returns! get used to it

    Thats only half way thru ur list and i can bet u will be disappointed. I hope this wasnt a serious article and i really hate when u amateur bloggers post some retarted things like this for fans to see and start building unreal expectations. People refer to your articles to get pro oppinions and get realistic feedback from someone who knows the game. you mis lead fans who dont know a whole lot about football to know your list of demands are pretty outrageous. They read this and then expect those things tonight and just end up getting terribly disappointed and begin to lack faith in this new Dolphin regime. Give us good stuff to read my man!!!

  3. Chris August 13, 2011 at 4:54 am #

    Do you have ANY social aptitude? This is very obviously meant to be humorous, smart guy.
    Oh, and we did return one for a td 🙂

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